May 5, 2010

What I have not

কী পাই নি তারি হিসাব মিলাতে
ki paai ni taar hishaab melatey (audio)

What I have, what I have not
My mind shies from taking stock
Today the flute has rung out
In all corners of my heart
In dark shades and in the light

Loved this earth have I
That is what I most recall
In many springs, southern winds
This basket of mine been filled

Tears reside in remote depths
In the deep tiers of my heart
Essence of ache in secret
Brings effort to fruition

Now and then did the strings snap
Why raise a hue and cry for that
Yet melody touched the right chords,
That is what I most recall
Time and again




Another version by Anandamayee Majumdar:

I will not ponder my pain
Of what I have failed to receive.
All I know is, a flute lilts in my heart
Meshed with light and shadows.

My love for this earth
Sweetens, seeps into all my memories.
I remember the springs, the southern drifts
That have fulled, freshened my bouquet.

My tears flow on
Through subterranean depths of my core,
The juice of agony nourishes
My sacred service in life.

Often enough
The strings of my lute have shattered, 
But why would I regret the rupture?
I have tuned them once more,
I have made the melodies soar,
These are my treasured triumphs
That culminate, and linger on.

1 comment:

  1. This song is so close to my heart. It's great to see someone shares a love for this song. Through translation, it's true, the sentiment of the song gets lost. Else how would you translate with the same precision "Saji" to English? Flower Pot? Flower basket? Does basket also come with the feeling that it is small and delicate and a work love? How do you express spring breeze can fill your Saji? Can spring breeze be held? Well not physically, but when spring breeze is compared with blossoms - tender and beautiful, perhaps it can be held in the saji. How do you express the deep anguish, pain, sorrow, and perhaps bereavement all together contained in the word, "hahakar"? Any word used to translate in English trivializes it. The last line of the Bangla song has a key - "Only". that they sang in tune over and over again - only that I remember today.

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